Why take the risk and leave a stable physical therapy job that would set my future family up for financial stability?
Why take the risk with pursuing Live RecoverED in a greater capacity?
Why take the risk and take a significant pay cut?
Why take the risk?
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In the world’s eyes, what I’m doing would be a poor decision. To leave a stable, well paying job with a pension, for a job that I need to rely on fundraising for my salary. A job with less stability, more uncertainty. Why would I do that?
Because God.
Because this is what God is calling me to. I’ve felt Him tugging at my heart these last few months. An unrest with my work as a school-based physical therapist, a job that I felt such intense joy and passion for before now replaced with uneasiness and unrest. My passion and sense of peace increased with every thought of pursuing Live RecoverED full time. Even with the uncertainty of my income not being guaranteed, even with needing to let go of control and rely more deeply than ever before on God with needing to raise financial support, even with the knowledge that I will likely never make as much as I am now, I still wholeheartedly know that this is what God is calling me to.
Because all those years of struggle, of tears, of feeling like I was in a pit to never climb out, where used for good. God used the struggle and darkness to prepare me for this point.
Years ago, I felt God speaking to my heart that He was preparing me for something big, for breakthrough. Soon weeks, months, and years passed. I started to give up on believing this big breakthrough was coming. Even though I was certain God spoke that promise over me.
And then rapidly recovery started to stick. When I invited God into my recovery, I started to become free. Eventually recovered from social anxiety- able to now public speak. Recovered from OCD- free to truly live my life. Recovered from anorexia and orthorexia- able to support others in their recovery journeys, be active in the recovery community, and start this beautiful ministry.
From the beginning of pursuing recovery to this day, I’ve always felt this deep connection to others that struggled with eating disorders. My eating disorder wasn’t the most severe of my mental illnesses, but nevertheless, I've felt the most connected to those that have/had eating disorders. I’ve called it a soul connection. This deep connection to help those with eating disorders to break free from their struggle, to know they’re not alone.
God is the reason why I’m pursuing Live RecoverED in a greater capacity, even with the uncertainty that comes with it. Even though there is uncertainty and the lies of anxiety creep in, with thoughts swirling:
“What if I can’t fundraise enough?
What if this organization fails?
What if I’m making a mistake?”,
I am certain that my God will provide, even if it’s not exactly as I have planned. I am certain that He is there for me and always will be. That He is at my side through this, walking hand in hand, step in step.
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A bit more into the specifics :) I am beyond excited for this amazing opportunity to have the capacity to work for Live RecoverED for 30 hours a week beginning September 2024 to: speak to high school health classes about eating disorders, increase knowledge to athletic teams about recovery, share my testimony and recovery with college Christian organizations, expand our peer mentorship program, train additional school staff in identifying and supporting students with body image and eating disorder struggles, offer more support groups and Bible studies, begin to write an eating disorder recovery devotional, and so much more.
In addition to my 30 hours a week through Live RecoverED, I’ll be starting a new physical therapy job this summer or fall at 10-20 hours a week, likely at a skilled nursing facility. In all honestly, this is quite anxiety-provoking for me. To start a completely new job, and all I’ve known since graduation is school-based physical therapy. Thoughts swirling, “Am I capable of this new setting? What if I don’t like it?” But a couple of days ago God prompted my thoughts, “What if it all works out? What if I love skilled nursing more than school-based?” I was only thinking of what could go wrong, but what about everything that could go right?
While I feel a deep sense of peace with this change, there is still quite a bit of anxiety and worry present which continues to be difficult to rein in with my controlling nature. Spiritual warfare, minor sickness and fatigue that continues to stick around for weeks, increasing PMDD symptoms. But, I know the enemy doesn’t want this ministry to succeed. The enemy doesn’t want me to look for what can go right with a new physical therapy position, He just wants me to live in fear, worry, and doubt. The enemy wants me to believe that we won’t raise enough funds and support, that this will fail. But I’m reminded of this song in the midst of those lies and spiritual attacks:
(Thank you by Life Church Worship)
Sickness can’t stop Your praise
Depression can’t take this song from me
Fear will never drain these lungs
Praise is still rising up
Pain won’t slow this down
Panic can’t take this peace from me
Nothing can stop us now
Praise is still pouring out
Even with the uncertainty and anxiety, I still feel this deep sense of peace, joy, and excitement for this new journey.
God has placed such beautiful dreams on my heart for this organization and I am beyond excited to see how these dreams unfold.
With love, Megan
If you're interested in hearing more about this ministry and potentially becoming a financial/prayer partner, please send me an email to liverecovered@gmail.com, I'd love to set up a time to chat with you!
Genesis 50:20- "You intended to harm me but God intended it for good, to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives."